July FRUIT. magazine Club

This month’s FRUIT. magazine Clubs were indeed productive ones! With Issue 19, we sat with the attending young ladies to discuss the toxic relationships and what to do about them.

The article we read together was from our Hey Ladies column and was titled “When to Leave.” After a passionate message from Tera, the lies of toxic relationships get debunked with advice on when and how to leave a toxic relationship. Such lies include, “he says he will change,” “I can’t leave him” and “we are meant to be together.”

The next page discussed the green, yellow and red flags that indicate if a boy is worth a young girl’s time. Green flags are good, yellow flags are cautionary and red flags are trouble. But when we discussed the red flags with the girls, they began to ask questions that showed how unaware they are of toxic relationships. They were not aware that a boy watching porn, giving physical punishment and being in a gang were all bad signs. One girl even said how physical abuse is simply “tough love.” We told her there is no reason for her boyfriend to ever put his hands on her!

Another girl asked if a good guy would want to be with her because of her past. It’s heartbreaking to hear how this girl does not believe that she deserves to be treated well by a man of God because of her past mistakes.

Most of the girls said they deserve to have someone treat them well, but they are not around in their area. These young women need to always know that there is someone out there for them. As the article said, they just have to broaden their horizons!

In another facility, the girls were more outspoken. Two girls argued over whether a girl should check a boyfriend’s phone.

“I can check his phone whenever I want!  There’s nothing wrong with that!”

“Then you don’t really trust him.”

“No, I just want to feel better!”

“Why would you need to feel better if you trust him?”

As Carolyn said, most of the girls may not agree with the advice, but at least we are giving them seeds of truth to think over.

It was very hopeful to hear that the girl who agreed that checking a boyfriend’s phone is a sign of distrust had left her toxic ex-boyfriend. It’s no wonder she agreed with what we were trying to teach.

To all the young ladies out there: if a man gives his heart to God, he deserves to have your heart. As the article says, “don’t settle.” Don’t settle ever!

Tera Swigart